More on Baby-Led Weaning

A couple of weeks ago, I briefly explained the premise of Baby-Led Weaning and how it's working out wonderfully for our family.  Here are a few more details on BLW.  When I get time, I'll try to upload a video of Andrew chewing up his food with only his gums.  It's pretty amazing.

Andrew's lunch one day last week: He's got fish (talapia) in one hand and a rice cake (sliced) in the other.  Andrew is nearly 8 months old.

Negatives of BLW:

• Mess, mess, and more mess:  As long as you're fine with this, there's no problem.  Being a bit of a neatnik, I have a hard time with this, but I'm getting over it.  I just deal with the fact that I might have to change him after each meal.  Many times I don't, but it's always a possibility.  A friend gave us an awesome bib that's really more of a smock.  It wipes clean and has long sleeves (and comes from England.  How cool is that?).  We will definitely be getting lots of use out of this!
• Concerns about choking:  The book, Baby-Led Weaning, explains how this doesn't need to be much of a concern.  Now a baby might gag, but as the authors explain, a younger baby's gag reflex is closer to the front of his mouth, and it moves further back over time.  So when a baby gags on something, it's pretty close to the front of his mouth, and as long as he's in an upright position, he'll spit the food out with no problem.  This has been our experience with Andrew, and I'm no more concerned about him choking than I was with Isabelle.   
• No way to gauge what baby eats:  Again, if you're fine with this, then it's not really a problem.  With BLW, you never know how much food the baby has eaten until you take him out of the high chair and see what food has fallen down in the seat.  I don't mind not knowing how much Andrew is eating because this is the attitude we've developed with Isabelle, our 2 year old.  We present her with a healthy meal.  If she eats it, great.  If she doesn't eat much, that's fine too.  She'll eat up at her next meal.  Isabelle has become a better eater since we've taken this approach, which was our pediatrician's suggestion.  I like that we're starting out this way with Andrew.  It's always easier to start as you mean to go, rather than changing up the rules later on.       

Positives of BLW: 

• Easy Peasy:  I love that I can just put food on his tray and enjoy my meal.  There's no stress or frustration involved in feeding the baby.
• Developing a positive attitude towards food:  Food is just fun for him, so he has a blast experiencing different foods.  There's nothing he won't try!
• Baby learns to regulate his own intake of food:  He is responsible for knowing when he's full, and I trust him on that one. It's the same way it works with breastfeeding, so there's no need to interfere with what he's been responsible for since birth.  Just like I don't force him to nurse for one more minute, I never make him take one more bite.
• No food to buy:  We don't buy babyfood, but then again, we never have.  I still bake sweet potatoes for him or slice up fresh peaches, but there's very little prep work involved in this method.

On Turning 30

I've dreaded turning 30 for a number of years.  My husband calls it "glorying in my youth."  I just call it immaturity.  But whatever you call it, that's me. 

It was my dad who said something along the lines of "What's the big deal, Gabby?  You've got the life you want, and it's the life of a 30 year old."  And it is. 

I've had two careers I loved, one teaching high school English, and another raising my babies.  And I've been able to get the degrees that I wanted.  We own a home that we love, have two cute but annoying dogs and two cute but mischievous kids. 

I woke up this morning (not the first wake-up, but the fourth wake-up) around 7:30 or so to the sound of my husband walking into our bedroom with our two year old.  She was saying "Happy Birthday, Mommy!"  It was probably the 50th time she had said that phrase recently, but the first time she'd said it on my actual birthday. 

My husband got the baby out of the nursery and brought him to me.  After I fed Andrew, I spent some time snuggling and just babbling with him.  His babble is "dada," not "mama," but that's fine with me.  Any babble is good babble, and my kids love their daddy.  I can't blame them.  He's a sweetie.

Andrew sleeps through the night at times but throw in a runny nose and the second tooth that's popping through his gums, and that means a long night for both of us.  We saw 11:30 pm, 1:30 am, 4:30 am, & 6:30 am.  But as much as I hate interrupted sleep, I love having a baby to hold and feed.  I'm really just happy to have my son. 

This particular birthday has been one that I've wanted to celebrate more than others.  It just happens to coincide with entering another decade.  The real reason I've wanted to celebrate is because just waking up and being alive has more significance this year than in the past.  We've had a really rough year. 

In some ways, it's easy to think I'm celebrating the fact that we made it through all the tough stuff.  But it's more than that.  I'm celebrating all the amazing things God has done this year. 

Things like getting my son to the hospital with very little time to spare, but just in time to get the life-saving surgery he needed.  And then completely and fully healing Andrew after having half a lung removed.  God has done a number of other physical things for us.  But the big stuff is what He has done spiritually. 

See, like any other human being, I hate pain.  I don't want to experience tough stuff.  But those are the things that God uses to grow us.  So He has brought me through incredible pain this year. 

Without great pain, I wouldn't know His great comfort.  I've become even more keenly aware that God is real.  Real enough to bring me incomprehensible peace.  I knew that before.  But I've never had to sit in His lap quite so much and soak in comfort.  And give Him my circumstances with complete trust. 

All the things that I've believed about God, pain, and the purpose of trials have become more real to me than ever before because I've had to really live them out on a daily, even hourly basis.  I've had to practice the art of training my thoughts to honor God, especially when I feel fear creeping in again.  And it's been amazing to see how God works through that.

We've also seen the ways that God provides through people.  We have been blessed with the most amazing family and friends.  The kind who will care for your two year old indefinitely while your son is having lung surgery.  Or feed the dogs.  Or drop everything to visit us in the hospital.  Or bring groceries once we got home.  Or a meal.  Or let me call, crying, at 9 pm with the latest crisis at the Daigle house.  And they talk me down once more. 

These same friends tell me the truth.  They tell me when they catch me being fearful and believing a lie.  And they help me combat it with truth.  And then they pray for me.  When my family or friends say they're praying for me, I know that they really are.

I am truly blessed.

So I love 30.  Not just because I woke up this morning to a happy, healthy family, and pretty pink roses that my sister ordered for me.  Life is so great because God is so great. He has done so many amazing things this year, but if He hadn't, He would still be great. 

Life is great because I know Jesus.  The Jesus who died so that I wouldn't have to pay the price for my sin, which is pretty wretched sin, by the way.  And I love Him even more because of the pain we've gone through, because I know that I can trust Him through everything.  He really is all-powerful.

Every morning, I wake up and read about God's goodness in His Word, and then I get to see it in real life.  While it's been tough, it's also been a pretty cool journey.

If my 20s were this amazing, I can't wait to see what God has in store for me in my 30s.  If it's fun or tough, and I have a feeling it'll be quite a bit of both, it really doesn't matter.  God will carry us through all of it and grow us even more, which means I'll be even more in love with Him.

Thank you, Lord.

The Scoop on Baby-Led Weaning

With baby #2, I decided to go against the grain once more and try Baby-Led Weaning (BLW).  Cuz that's how I roll.  Once you nurse your baby past a year, cloth diaper, and make babyfood, you're pretty much labeled a nut or a hippie, so you may as well go all out. 

No, really, the truth is that I had read a little bit about it on various blogs, enough to pique my interest.  It sounded like a great way to create healthy eating habits for little ones.  And I really am up for trying new things with my kids, provided I have the time needed to properly research the technique and make sure it works for our family. 

The term weaning refers to giving anything to your baby that is not breastmilk or formula.  With typical weaning, parents begin spoonfeeding cereal and pureed fruits & veggies to their little ones starting anywhere from 4-6 months.  The current AAP recommendations are that while it is best to wait until 6 months, it is acceptable to begin 4 months.  Our pediatrician says that he expects the AAP to come down more firmly on the 6 month issue in the near future. 

What is BLW?
BLW is incredibly popular in the UK and is quickly gaining popularity here in the US as well.  That said, I don't know anyone else who has followed this method of introducing solid foods.

The short explanation of BLW is that you skip the purees and go straight to finger food.  Contrary to what Gerber would have you believe, babies as young as six months are capable of chewing and sucking fruits, vegetables, bread, and meats.  Moms have actually been doing this for ages, but not really talking about it.  In a way, it's the "lazy" thing to do.  But I don't mind feeding my baby the lazy way.  I do enough hard work around my house that I could care less if anyone thinks I'm lazy.  My house is clean and my kids are happy.  Go ahead & call me lazy. But I digress.    

The BLW approach is pretty hands-off.  Simply put food on the babies high chair tray and let baby eat.  At first, the baby may just play with the food or taste it and spit it back out.  But with time, babies get the idea and really love feeding themselves. 

With BLW, there is much less emphasis on how much food the baby eats.  Instead, the emphasis is on experience.  It's important for baby to sit with the family at meal times, exploring and playing with food until he decides that he is ready to join in the fun too.  If the six month old eats a little and spits it back out, there's no need for concern. Six month olds should still get the bulk of their calories from milk feeds.  Slowly, over the course of the next six months, baby will begin eating more and more food, slowly trading milk feeds for solid feeds.  But he'll do it in his timing. 

BLW also encourages baby to eat the same things as the family, which should make it much easier to prepare meals for the baby, especially for those of us who aren't big on store bought purees.  The authors even advise letting baby simply grab food off the parents' plates. 

Another huge aspect of BLW is that only baby puts food in his mouth.  This allows him to guide the whole process and respond to his internal cues of fullness.  Current thinking is that parents should not encourage children to make a "happy plate" by eating everything they've been served.  Pediatricians and researchers believe that this can lead to eating disorders, both obesity and anorexia.  So BLW says that parents simply offer healthy meals and let baby feed himself.  When he's full, he'll stop eating. 

My Questions and Concerns
I found BLW to be a very thought-provoking book.  I enjoyed it and felt much of it to be very wise.  At the same time, other parts were "pie in the sky" to me.  In other words, they were completly unrealistic. 

For example, take food allergies.  Common practice is to follow the four day wait rule when introducing new foods to your baby.  My pediatrician advises waiting a full week between introducing new foods!  This enables mom to watch baby for any adverse reactions to the new food.   BLW says not to worry about waiting between foods.  Babies tend to avoid foods that they are allergic to.  They cite examples of babies who didn't want strawberries, and mom later learned that they were allergic to the fruit.

Really?  My son loved bananas.  He pigged out on them one day for lunch, and I was happy because they're such an easy food to give babies, especially when traveling.  He broke out in a rash, but that's nothing new.  Andrew's a rashy kid with sensitive skin like his mommy.  But guess what he did at naptime.  He vomited bananas.  Really.  I don't know if it's an allergy or an intolerance, but I'm hoping it's just an intolerance that will be outgrown.  We'll try again soon. 

Some of the results that are billed as BLW's selling points can also be achieved by other means.  I think your child might be more likely to love healthy foods, handle new textures and tastes, develop a positive attitude towards food, and gain better appetite control through BLW.  But I also think those same objectives can be obtained with traditional purees too.

How is BLW working out for our family?
We love it.  We absolutely love it.  It's so easy.  I cut food into finger-like strips and put it on Andrew's tray.  He feeds himself while I eat my meal.  Easy as pie.

Andrew loves food.  At lunch today, he and Izzy shared a peach.  He ate one half while she worked on the other (and a sandwich), but she couldn't eat all of hers, so he ate what was left, as well as sweet potato strips too.  And that was after a milk feed.  AND he's only 7 months old!

I'm not ready for Andrew to eat off my plate or eat the exact same meals as us yet.  I'm still at the stage of introducing new foods and waiting for his reaction.  BLW doesn't advise this, but I'm doing it anyway because I'm more cautious than perhaps other parents would be.  But soon, as more foods are introduced, we'll be ready for him to eat the exact same meals as us.  I can see that happening in the next month or two.

If you're trying to decide if BLW is for you, definitely get the book so that you can get a good idea of the logic behind it.  There are also a few safety issues that the authors will warn you about.  For example, babies tend to "chipmunk" food in their cheeks, so it's important to check their mouths before putting them down for a nap or strapping them into a carseat, where it can present a choking hazard.   

Andrew loves peaches, sweet potatoes, rice cakes, toast, broccoli, avocado, carrots, green beans, rice cereal, and blueberry muffins. And Olive Garden's breadsticks, but who doesn't like those? He was indifferent to chicken. And he's only been eating for one month! It's all I can do to wait a few days before introducing something else, because I know he will love anything I put in front of him. I have no idea if he loves food because we're doing BLW or because he just loves to eat. Regardless, this is a really fun way to feed him and it's easy on me, so it's definitely a win-win situation.

What are your thoughts on BLW?  Any ther BLWers out there?

Where were you on 9/11?

On September 11, 2001, I was sitting in Dr. Upali's chemistry class at Louisiana Tech University.  I was a junior and had just experienced the most incredible summer of my life. 

I spent the majority of my summer in Washington, DC as part of Campus Crusade for Christ's (Cru) DC Internship Project.  The goal was to intern in our nation's capital and reach out to other interns in the city.

I had landed an internship with the Christian Coalition of America.  Their original plans for me involved working with public relations or something in that vein, but I ended up working with their lobbiest.  I was a political science major with a minor in journalism at the time (I later switched it to a minor in English because I couldn't commit such a huge amount of time to something that was just a minor).  So the lobbiest snatched me up, and I worked hard on issues all summer long, along with another intern, Kim.  We would research the issues, attend meetings with congressmen, senators, and other lobbiests on the hot topics of the summer, and then write position letters, talking points, and press releases.  We also worked with grass roots lobbying efforts. 

I don't know what the best part of my summer was:  Developing my worldview as a Christian, experiencing lifestyle evangelism firsthand, or deepening my walk and dependency upon the Lord.  Meeting incredible politicians was just icing on the cake, compared to reaching the world for Christ.  Sailing on the Potomac, singing and listening to a friend play guitar while our feet hung off the Lincoln Memorial, and feeling like I was walking in a postcard had nothing on introducing people to the God who saves.

Visiting with Congressman Jim McCrery (R-LA)

So with the summer under my belt and a renewed focus on my purpose in life, I started my junior year.  I was nineteen, almost twenty, and big things would be happening this year.  Big things like a wedding proposal, engagement, and our wedding.

On September 11, 2011, I sat through one of my favorite professor's chem class, laughing inwardly at the way that Dr. Upali pronounced "kinetic energy," which actually sounded like "Kennedy Kennedy" in his Sri Lankan accent. 

Afterwards, I traipsed across campus, passing up Adams Dorm, where my good friend Laura & I shared a room.  Instead, I made my way to the Student Center to grab a cup of coffee from my future husband, who served up espresso at Java City.

As soon as I walked into the Student Center, I knew something was wrong.  The room was packed but silent.  Everyone stared at the televisions.  Damian, who would become my fiance in less than a month, filled me in on the details.  Two planes had crashed into the World Trade Center.  We stood in silence as we watched the towers fall.

As a political science major, it was pretty clear what was going on.  Bin Laden had not taken the credit yet, but I mentioned his name to Damian immediately.  In one of my poli. sci. classes, probably International Relations, we had read all about his declaration of jihad.  While the rest of the country believed President Bush was in an undisclosed location, we received word that he had landed at Barksdale Airforce Base, just an hour away from us.  A student's parent worked there, and she announced the president's location to every person in the Student Center. 

I had no other classes that day, and at some point that morning, I headed back to my dorm, calling my mom and crying.  I was especially upset once the Pentagon was attacked.  There were so many rumors and threats to the rest of DC that I was concerned about all the people I had met that summer.  Just five weeks before, I had been living in that city, in a student apartment at George Washington University.  Now I was safe at home in Louisiana, but like everyone else, I was terrified for my country.  My mom and I stayed on the phone and watched the news together for hours. 

I remember thinking that surely classes would be cancelled.  There was no way they actually expected us to study when we were all glued to FoxNews & CNN.  I still think we would've all gotten a lot more studying done in college if there was no such thing as 24 hour news stations, especially since the crazy election of 2000 and 9/11 both happened while I was in college.  Late that night, I somehow managed to finish my assignment for Constitutional Law I and discovered the next day that yes, the professors did expect us to complete our assignments.

The next weeks were a blur.  Friends' boyfriends were called out with the National Guard and everyone became incredibly patriotic.  I still think the freedom fries thing was uncalled for.  Remember the anthrax scares?  One of my coworkers at CCA e-mailed me a stunning picture of DC, taken from their office.  Just blocks from the capital, we had an amazing view of DC.  In his photo, the city was beautiful, but lights were on in senate buildings, which were being searched for anthrax.        

Ten years later, I've graduated college, become a teacher, completed grad school and become a mom.   My life has completely changed.  I don't watch the news very often and I can no longer recognize congressmen and senators within seconds of seeing their faces on TV, much less tell you their stances on all the important issues.  Instead of swimming in Shakespeare, electoral college maps, and 15 page papers, I spend my time chasing kids, meal planning, and researching the latest guidelines regarding solid foods and car seats. 

I try to stay up on current events, but I'm a little embarrased about my lack of knowledge in the political realm.  But I remember 9/11.  It's our generation's Kennedy Assasination.  I remember every detail of that day, and I remember the sick feeling we all carried with us.  We all remember.  We always will.

Where were you that day?

I'm linking up with NOBH.

Broccoli Wokly: Baby-Led Weaning in Real Life

Baby-Led Weaning, by Rapley and Murkett, clearly states that broccoli makes a great first food.  The stem serves as an excellent handle while the top is perfect for gnawing. 

When I first read this, I remember thinking "What about gas?"  Broccoli makes adults gassy, so I can only imagine what it would do to a baby.

Over the past month, Andrew has tried a variety of the fruits and veggies that are typical for babies his age, leaving little left to try that is part of our family's normal diet.  But all of us like steamed broccoli, so I decided that we would follow BLW's advice and give it a try once he hit 7 months. 

He loved it!  It was pretty impressive to see such a young baby eating and enjoying a whole stalk of broccoli.  We finished dinner happy, pleased that we had found another vegetable that all of us could eat together.

I bet the seasoned moms out there can predict what happened at bedtime.

He was one fussy baby. 

The kid woke up at 10 pm, 12 am, 2:30 am, 4:30 am, and 6 am. Our 2 year old woke up around 7.  Mommy was just a little bit grouchy the next morning.  But coffee is good.  Really good.

The moral of the story?  Go with your gut, mamas.  And drink coffee.

I'll try to make time for a lengthy review of Baby-Led Weaning next week.  I'll explain the basic premise, how it's supposed to work, our experience so far, and our points of disagreement with the book. 

Laboring on Labor Day

The work kind of labor, not the giving birth kind.  There's no bun in this oven!

We spent our Labor Day weekend building a deck.  When I say "we," I really mean he or they.  My husband and his dad did all the work, while the women just kept up with the kids, ran the household, and observed.  I didn't join in the work until Damian's parents left and he needed an extra hand.  He likes to lay the boards with precision.  Here's what the deck looks like:

Before:  The 16 year old deck was in terrible shape.  

During:  He pulled up the old deck and spent quite a bit of time measuring and forming the new deck.  Damian is a "measure ten times, cut once" kinda guy, so it took a while.  But that's what you want in a product engineer, right?  Those posts are crooked because the concrete hadn't been poured yet.

So Far:  With only two boards left to put down, the decking is nearly complete.  Last night, Damian built a small railing, seen in the picture, to keep the dogs from getting out of the yard again (sorry, neighbors!).

He'll finish up the railings in the next week or two.  The posts are high because our long term plan is to build a pergola above the deck. 

I had a nice shot of Damian and his dad working hard together, but as I was taking the picture, my husband said "And don't put it on your blog."  Darn!

I can't wait for the finished product.  I'm also looking forward to next spring, when we'll be ready to do some work on the flower beds in both the front and back yards.

Hope you had a nice Labor Day too!



What Every New Mom Needs

After my first baby was born, a friend of mine from China told me that back home, a woman is a queen for a month or two after her baby is born.  All of the local women, as well as family members, help out with meals and cleaning so that she can rest and spend time with her baby.  Sounds wonderful to me! 

I don't think it has to be a complete dream, however.  I think we can be queens here as well, with the right attitude and support system. 

Sometimes it's hard to be a queen and let others take care of us. We moms think we have to do it all and be it all.  But having a new baby, whether it's your first or fifth, can be quite an adjustment. 

I've learned this lesson and now make it a point to stay in my pajamas all day after having a baby.  It's true.  Just ask anyone who brings a meal to us after we have a baby.  I find that it helps me relax and stay in bed more if I'm in my jammies all day long.  I also have the added bonus of c-section recovery, so physical rest is even more vital for me, and staying in my jammies is my way of saying "I'm off duty."

 

It's important to rest and recuperate as much as possible after having a baby.  Maternal exhaustion after the birth of a baby is linked to incidences of post-partum depression, so the more R&R you can get, the better off you and your family will be months later

What can we do to help our friends who are having babies?  It can be difficult to know how to help, especially if you've never had a baby yourself.  Check out my list of what every new mom needs and see if there's just one thing you can do to be a blessing to a friend when she has a baby.

What Every New Mom Needs

1. Rest: If you really know the mom well, the best thing you could do for her is help with late night duty. This requires the greatest of sacrifices, your sleep! I had the opportunity to spend a night at my brother's house just days after his daughter was born. He and I rotated caring for sweet little Harli so that his wife could get the rest that she needed after giving birth. I paid for it the next day with morning sickness, but I learned that there's a reason it's completely impossible to have a newborn and be 5 months pregnant at the same time.  God never intended our bodies to handle that level of exhaustion!  That said, it was totally worth it to be a blessing to Heidi and bond with my new niece. 
2. 
   Hot Meals: Bring a hot meal to the family. I can tell you from experience that they won't really care what it is! At our house, our attitude is if it's edible and you bring it over, we'll eat it for dinner. We appreciate meals so much. And it really doesn't matter if it's homecooked or not. If you don't have time to cook, bring pizza or fried chicken over. And if the mom is a nursing mom, they'll probably appreciate that meal even more. After the baby is born, it becomes so difficult to put dinner together because the baby is eating around the clock.
3. Cold Meals: Huh? Yep, cold meals. As in freezer meals. It can be a bit tricky to work out the logistics, but with proper planning, you can do it for a friend. When one friend was pregnant, I planned her freezer meals about a month or two ahead of time. As I made lasagna, chili, crawfish fettucini, or breakfast casserole for my family, I put aside a pan for her family as well. Then a week before her baby was born, I delivered the goods to her. I wish I had time to do this more often, but it's just not always possible. One of the biggest ways I was blessed after my first child was born was when a dear friend rang our doorbell and delivered a stack of 4 pans to my husband. For our small family, it was the equivalent of 8 days worth of meals!
4. 
   
   A Clean House: By the time the baby is 3 or 4 weeks old, you can bet those showers and floors are in need of a good cleaning, but I'm sure she's not up for it yet. Offer to clean them for your friend! She may not take you up on the offer, but it wouldn't hurt to try!
5. A Grandmother: Someone once offered to rock my baby for me! A sweet older woman at church told me that if I ever needed a nap when my baby was fussy, give her a call and she would rock my daughter. How sweet is that? I didn't take her up on the offer because the logistics didn't work (she lives across town), but just the idea of it warmed my heart!
6. A Nap & a Break: If the mom has older children, offer to borrow her minivan and take them for an afternoon. You can take them to the park or bring them back to your house, but offer to let her have some time with her newborn for a bit. If you time it right, she just might be able to squeeze a nap in!
7. Encouraging words:  There's nothing a new mom needs more than encouragement.  After I had my first baby, I had a lot of struggles with nursing in those first two weeks.  Emotionally, it was very difficult, but one thing that helped was knowing I wasn't alone.  I received several phone calls from friends just to check in on me.  I was too tired to pick up the phone, but just hearing their messages was all the encouragement I needed.  And when we started bringing the baby out, I remember how sweet it was to hear people comment on how beautiful she was, instead of saying "how tiny!"  New moms are sensitive.  If we hear too many "how tiny!" or "how plump!" statements, we start worrying.  Maybe she is too small!  Maybe she is too chunky.  Maybe his head is kind of big.  Maybe his legs are too skinny.  Most moms with newborns worry about something, so try to keep your comments positive.  I distinctly remember a friend of ours (who actually delivered our second baby) referring to our first, Isabelle, as a Thumbelina baby.  For some reason, this sounded so kind and positive in comparison to the gazillion "she's so little"s I'd already heard.  No one intended anything negative, but new mom paranoia always runs pretty high.    

Along those lines, avoid criticism and unsolicited advice.  When a woman has a baby, her hormones are still in full swing, and the last thing she needs is negativity.  I don't care if she stopped nursing pretty early on or if she never tried to begin with.  You can bet that mom is doing the absolute best she can, and she needs the affirmation of other women, not harsh words.  Tell her what a great job she's doing, tell her how perfect her baby is, and tell her she can do it, but save the criticism. 

I'm sure you've picked up by now that I'm just a tiny bit passionate about breastfeeding.  But honestly, I also believe that good moms feed their babies.  Period.  Your method of feeding does not determine your worth as a mom. 

Or maybe it's something different.  Maybe she (gasp!) lets her baby sleep in the bed with her!  Or she gives it a pacifier.  Or she puts it to sleep on its tummy.  Or she has her baby on a schedule.  Or she doesn't!  Or a thousand other things that half the population disagrees with and the other half thinks is perfectly fine.  It's not our job to be the mommy police.  That's a lesson I've been learning lately. 

Edify.  Encourage.  Serve.  But don't criticize.